Monday, June 27, 2011

Brrrrrrrrrr!

Another entry that had to get crossed off eventually but needed the right conditions to do so, namely a hot muggy day. The sort of weather that has you fiddling with your collar when all you're doing is sitting down needs some drastic actions and what could be better than an ice bath. Designed for athletes to do something or other with the muscles, ice baths must have been invented by people suffering with severe cases of schadenfreude. As I remembered from the New Years Day swim, the discomfort you feel when the water touches your feet is only minor compared to what happens after that. There are few rude awakenings that can compete with the sensation of cold water above waist level, it's a shocker!

As with some of the other entries in the book I'm glad this one's over and done with. On the plus side, I'm claiming this as June's contribution to the year as the pledge was at least one 'cool' thing a month. I'm still trying to thaw out half an hour after doing it while everyone else is still hot and bothered so it's all good ;)

Rossifer x

Sunday, June 19, 2011

4 weddings and a Christening

4th wedding of the year for me, this time with the actual 'wedding' bit thrown in and not just the reception. Just a quick entry in the book this one as not only was the day itself highly enjoyable, I hope it means a new and happier beginning to a family close to my heart, hears hoping Gary and Vicki's big day was the start of getting things back as they were.


I loved the crazy golf and the fireworks, a bit baffled by the sleepy butterflies and really loved the band. If I was to be married tomorrow I'd love them to be there:- http://www.famousfiveband.com/

Good luck to the future for Gary and Vicki, huge thanks for a cracking day. My 3 favourite pictures of the day below.

Rossifer x

Monday, June 13, 2011

For the Snark was a Boojum, you see.

An obscure title for what is turning out to be an equally questionable month. The only one of the year so far where I have had no health worries to stop me and yet nothing epic to cross off the list. 'One big thing a month' average over the year, that I'm sure is still very much on. For this month, at least, I'll have to settle for a few smaller entries.


By 11:59pm in a couple of weeks time I will have spent the month on a Segway (again), driving down to Dorset for some camping followed by a few hours on the Scout friendly 'Brownsea Island', a stones throw from the obscurely rich residents of 'Sandbanks' where relative remoteness can be yours for 7 digits or more. I'd have read a baffling book recommended to me on New Year's Eve and, in keeping with Lewis Carroll, been on the other side of the Looking Glass for a change where after another year spent invigilating exams I will be sitting my own 3 hour juncture in a couple of days time, weirdly enough in the same masonic lodge as the last exam I had. I always thought the OU had a touch of the Illuminati about it.

As the plug had been pulled for the dragonboat racing (still gutted about that) I'm having to swap my planned 'month off' from the Purple Book for this month. Happily in July I'll be returning to Bracknell, this time with my feet well and truly off the ground. It's Go Ape with Shaft and hopefully a few peeps from work. After watching Abz having a go it looks fun and more importantly doable. I've still got this fear of freezing as, to put it bluntly, if you get stuck you're on your own. There's not some chappie with a jetpack to come and save you.

I'm already restless for a new adventure. The sharks aren't until November, and Peru is still an age away. Everything else in-between sounds delightfully random but nowhere near as epic. I need a new bridge to find, an entry into the book so fantastic it will type itself once completed as I'll be too busy savouring the delights of it. Answers, as ever, on a postcard please :)

Rossifer x

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Seg-May

For once fortune had smiled upon me. Instead of merely making my own luck, today's activity had been gifted to me thanks to an online competition by Reading 107. All you had to do was fill in your details and type in the squiggly code at the bottom of the page. Weirdly enough I thought I'd failed in doing this as each time it came up with an error message for me. I gave up but weeks later received an email saying I'd won 4 tickets to the Go Ape in Bracknell where I would be Segwaying with 3 of whoever I would choose to join me.


Or so I thought. Despite texting my friend Abi requesting her son's vital statistics, it turned out he was a stone too light to be allowed to ride a segway. We were left with the choice of us all waiting a few hours to do the actual Go Ape thing in the trees or Sean, Abi's son, would be left disappointed. Not liking the sound of either of those I came up with a compromise. Me and my wingman Craig would go segwaying and the other two would Go Ape, but with a less scarier wait of 2 hours as the 2:00 group had just enough space for them.

Segwaying ended up moving me in the same way Jet Skiing did which Craig introduced me to, only this activity would be much harder to get
to grips with early on. With just a basic knowledge of physics, the Segway looked completely daunting to me. Had Newton been standing next to me he'd have wagered me falling off after a second and would have been baffled upon losing the bet. The Segway is controlled by the movable handle you hold onto. Moving forward and backwards is as difficult and as easy as tilting forwards and backwards and the turns are performed by tilting, not turning the handle to either direction. The first 10 minutes feel very weird I must say. The training ground is an oval course with a short cut through the middle with a couple of humps, well worth going over as you'll be facing bigger tests later on. It doesn't matter what speed you're going, you will always make it over the hill, the Segway's are amazing things. No idea how they work but i'll leave that knowledge to the guy that created them.

After the training and the brief form our surfer looking dude we were allowed to go on the course proper with 3 different paths and a cheeky little skills section with some awkward turns and bumps. After a few laps of the easier tracks you can't wait to do the longer and more exciting one. The things can really shift, especially when your surfer dude trainer turns up the speed using the controller you have around your neck at all times. It looks like a stopwatch and works like a remote key for your car and I want one! Me and Craig were tempted to hijack a couple of the Segways to get home, I'd recommend anyone giving it a go. As long as you're heavy enough that is...

Grounded after the disappoint they wouldn't be riding, underweight Sean and mum Abi would soon be flying, if only temporarily via zip wire and red and blue carabiners. Part of the reason I was happy with the compromise made earlier is that I'm not the best with heights and would happily leave the Go Ape entry of the Purple Book for another day, especially now I know I could probably manage it after watching the others. After the briefing, and Sean's impeccable display of how NOT to connect safely at each point it was up in the trees they went. 5 sections, each with a rope ladder to climb at the start, a couple of obstacles in between and a zip wire finale. Sean managed to land safe enough each time but it was Abi who was providing me with ample material for you've been framed with some comedy slides and dismounts. Funniest moment had to be the swing to the net where Abi somehow managed to bounce off it and left hanging!

In some way I'll be breaking my own rules in the fact I'll be going back to Go Ape, sooner rather than later. I hope to do the actual Go Ape bit myself soon but I'll actually be doing the Segway again with Mum and anyone else who is interested. Days like today and a few weeks ago when I got my cousin Carol to book something she really fancied doing and just needed a little push to do so reminded me of one of the reasons the Purple Book has changed my life for the better. In doing all these random things and actively looking for new things to do, I am encouraging people to do the same. Instead of spending another weekend looking for things to do, my cousin would be stain glass windowing, my friend Abi and her son would be swinging and sliding through the trees and I would be racing around a forest floor with my mate Craig on another fantastic discovery - The Segway, May's entry into the one cool thing a month year of 2011 and a worthy entry into the good book.


Rossifer x

Thursday, April 21, 2011

24 Hour Eat-athon

March had seen me well and truly catch up with my 'one cool thing a month' averages, now April brought with it a new challenge. Far from being a quiet month with plenty of cool things lined up and people to see, none of them were purple material and there was nothing lined up. Having lost all that weight several weeks ago and taking a long time putting it on I came up with an idea which would solve my weight problem and lack of April befuddlement - a 24 hour eat-athon.

I'd checked previously with my Kung Fu sifu that this was possible and asked if there were any reasons I really shouldn't doing it. After calling me nuts (as usual!) he said it would be more than possible and gave me some pointers. I was running out of free days in the holidays in which to do it so thought I'd spring it on myself the day before going down to Somerset with no real idea on what I'd be eating although i'd stocked up the day before and given myself a brief - eat something every hour, on the hour, for an entire 24 hour period.

4 O'Clock on a Tuesday morning when you don't need to be up is a rude awakening I can tell you! I got up a few minutes before 4 to make sure I was eating at 4 on the dot, I took a picture off me and the clock and posted it quickly after that to prove I wasn't cheating by doing it much later, I didn't have to pretend to be bewildered as it really did feel that weird. I made the mistake of blinking as 5, 6 and 7 O' Clock seem to come around very quick. By 9 O'Clock I'd become well and truly sick of the site of food and was pining for my bed. I'd planned to meet up with some workmates at 12 for lunch and was wondering how I'd manage any of it plus any more after that.

Expecting to feel truly wrecked at lunch, weirdly enough things started to become much easier. I'd brought an emergency banana as I knew I'd probably need something before getting back after we'd all finished, despite the fact I was now sick of the sight of bananas, this being the 3rd of the day. My love of food started kicking in and not only did I start eating more during the day, I started looking forward to the alarm going off every 3 minutes to the hour in case I forgot. I posted the updates every few hours, including the 9 O'Clock one as a special request from an antipodean mate of mine who wanted a 'proof of eating' pic. I got bored of the red clock pics as well so started using food and asking people for their watches to mix it up a tad ;)

Things started getting tricky again when we moved back into single figures for the time but I could see the end by then and had Jonathan Creek to keep me company. At that stage the 3 minute warning alarm started becoming annoying again as I was finding it more and more tempting to stop sitting on my futon and start sleeping on it. The 2nd Muller rice of the day was the last munch before sleep at 3:00am and then came the horrible wait for the last minutes of the hour before it would all be over. After quietly popping next door to put the final pictures off it was sleeping bliss, 4 hours before I'd be getting up to tell the Somerset lot all about it and meeting the two new additions to my legendary extended family. Lottie and Gracie Fear, the world welcomes you.

  • 3 bowls of cereal
  • 2 lots of grapes
  • 2 lots of strawberries
  • 2 biscuit dunking sessions
  • Bacon and brie sarnie and chips
  • 2 muller rices
  • Pack of wotsits
  • Cheese and ham slice
  • Glass of ice cream
  • 3 bananas
  • Plate of ravioli
  • Midnight crumpets
  • 2 hot cross buns
  • Kitkat.
Rossifer x

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Let me stand next to your fire

Another leap into the unknown, the firewalk came quickly after the fantastic day in Worcestershire with the Scooby and the Aston. After the cancellation of the London one due to illness, the Southampton one because of over subscription and the Bridgewater one as it was on the day of my grading, I would be travelling down to Gosport, raising money for the KIDS charity which looks after disabled children. The organiser of the walk i'd missed a few weeks back gave a very generous offer of returning all the money I'd raised. I was tempted to take it and use it on a future one but it wasn't their fault I couldn't make it so I certainly wasn't going to take any money back from them.


With my borrowed sat nav in the car, despite leaving it a bit late, I was ready for the off. My
beloved Mavis now had a voice, but then started to get a wee bit confused. The estimated arrival time fluctuated from 6:30pm, to 7:00pm and then 6:45pm and decided to recalculate the journey during a key lane change which resulted in a few choice words which would have made a Tourettes sufferer blush. Despite the sat nav falling off the windscreen a few times (resulting in a few more words of wisdom), mavis got me down there, not helped by the venue being ridiculously hard to find. It would have been easier trying to find a vegan in a butchers.

Arriving just after 7 I had time to get the formalities over with as well as having a first look at the fire I'd be walking over. For the first time at that point I had a moment of clarity of what I was about to do. I have nothing but a healthy fear of fire and was trying to work out how the hell I was going to make it across this without getting any blisters. A mate at work had done it before and sworn she'd received no blisters but I was still dubious. 7:30 and we we're all called into the 'Firewalkers only' room. I loved that bit, I've got this thing about wanting to peep behind those doors with 'private' on them so I felt I was getting one over on the owners of those doors! The size and decor of the room made it look as if we were about to hold a seance. It was just big enough to seat the 15 of us doing it and the very confident without being cocky guy who would be showing us how to do it. I, along with half the people there I think, expected some sort of special technique which had to be learnt in order to accomplish such a feat and, well there wasn't. We had the history of the event, examples around the world and the basics on what not to do. From what he was telling us it seemed nothing more than taking a deep breath and going for it, and that's, what it turned out, was exactly what we did. As a 'test of faith', he asked a couple of people to break an arrow using only their necks and a wall. The pointed bit was placed on the wall and the other end on their oesophagus (gap in the middle of your neck). Through nothing more than moving forward, the arrow broke and the willing volunteers had a cool souvenir. The final word was, if you can do that, have no worries about walking across fire.

After the pow wow, the 16 of us went outside. The small collection of people outside had grown to a crowd of cheering people surrounding the cordoned off hot coals. It was a great feeling that bit, I'd brought no one with me to watch but at that bit, everyone was getting the cheers. Through to where the coals were it was socks and shoes off, trouser legs up. Scott, the twice world record holder for firewalking and the guy who had taught us was to go first to ease any tension any doubters among us may have had. To be fair though, the coals in front of us looked only a fraction as daunting as the flaming logs I'd seen an hour earlier. The temperature of the coals was measured - 590°C, damn near 6 times the boiling point of water. I won't elaborate too much but we'd been told the popular scientific theories about how walking on such a temperature was possible. Scott took a breath, and over he went, little bit of smoke coming from each footstep. I couldn't help thinking of when I went skydiving. I remember the moment when people started leaving the plane we were in. Half of me was in turmoil but the other half kicked in and just excepted it as normal as everyone else was doing and it was the same here. "A perfectly sane man has just walked over fire. Fair enough, my turn!". A few of the others followed with no drama and it was my turn. So I took my breath, and off I went. I got to end, had my little cheer from the crowd and wiped my feet as we were all told to do, and joined the queue to have another go. We all went again, and again and when asked if anyone wanted one final go I was the last over. Nothing, no hot feet, blisters, not even the uncomfortable feeling of walking on an uneven surface. Picture walking barefoot outside, you always manage to find that one blasted stone, right on the heel. Nope, nothing. Weirdly enough the warm sensation came when we were stood on the grass at the end being bigged up by Scott and receiving our certificates. Afterwards I sat down to reply to all the texts but was scanning my feet for... something, ANYTHING! They were filthy but they were also flawless. It was about then it started kicking in what i'd done. I had trouble expressing the joy at having done something so fantastic to a rather sleepy sounding Dad on the home phone but I left it a few moments to let it all sink in. I'd walked over fire and felt thoroughly fantastic for having done so. As with moments such as the sky dive and find the bridge I loved the way it made me feel straight after. This bit will sound corny so apologies but it did feel like a semi phoenix rising from the flames moment, mainly because of it's timing and the fact this was my 3rd attempt at trying to do it. After feeling so rough the previous month I was getting back to how things used to be, health and postimism returning as one.

1. Dream helicopter ride - Best day ever
2. The leap of faith - Best single moment in my life
3. Rossifer's big apple
4. Find the bridge
5. Jet skiing
6. Back on track - Aston day
7 & 8 Getting stoned on the longest day
9. Fire walking
10. Climbing Snowdon

I was shocked but pleasantly surprised the day after when ranking this among the other entries in the book over the last couple of years. An epic evening the night before had reached no higher than 9th on my list, proving the effect the book has had on my life. This list was the 10 most enjoyable and didn't even include the more random entries such as the compost mile and the long walk home. Plenty of things coming up to look forward to, who knows how high up the list they'll feature. Now then, what's next...? ;)

Rossifer x


Big thanks to Scott and Mrs Scott from UK Firewalking and the peeps from KIDS.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Back on track

January saw a fantastic start to the year, February brought everything to an abrupt halt and now March has well and truly turned things around. After the swim on the first day of this year 2011 had the potential of being the best yet, the virus I had mid February soon had the danger of making it the worst of the Purple Book years. The 3 weeks of the illness which made has made me the sickest i've been since birth and the subsequent days trying to recover have had a huge impact on the way i've chosen to live my life. As well as the cancellation of my firewalk and a couple of social gatherings, my stone loss in weight as guaranteed a non appearance in both the half and full marathon for this year.


Negatives over, thanks to a group of lovely people at work bringing me daily food goodies and my own lovely two at home, the weight is going back on and the postimism is coming back. As well as that, the calendar brings with it a fantastic line up of events. For starters, the chance to watch an NBA game live, here in England. Still feeling rough, this would be one event I would not be denied. Watching the Nets playing the Raptors has well and truly re-sparked my love for the divine game. Next would be a trip to the theatre to watch the beautifully made War horse, not before having the best Thai food I've ever had. While both of these were fantastic, neither truly counted as one of my 'one cool thing a month' activities that I'd promised myself in January as it's all about participation. On the 24th I'd be walking over fire but first, I'd be driving my dream car.

Weirdly enough I have no fear (at the moment) at the thought of walking over red hot coals, but had a huge fear of getting behind the wheel of an Aston Martin DB9. I'd had the drive around in a Chrylser with 5 other guys to see the layout of the track. I knew nothing about racing lines and apex's so tried to remember everything being said. After the formalities, my name was called out. i was surrounded by Audis, Lambourgines, Ferrari's and the like but there was only one I was interested in and I was about to drive it. Getting behind the wheel, despite the über relxed instructor, I was starting to brick it. One thought came into my mind "don't you dare do anything to harm this beautiful car!". It was the first automatic car I'd ever been in, with the flappy panel gearbox I'd heard Jeremy Clarkson mention so often on Top Gear. I've got to say, without a shred of ego, it's the easiest car I've ever driven. Your left foot remains a passenger throughout, the right one needs only to brake and go faster, the gear changes are done by the finger tips and are effortless. The first lap feels surreal, I have no idea how fast I'm going but would imagine a milk float would have a fair chance of beating me to the corners. Being in a car designed to go fast, everything feels effortless. The 70+ mph I'd been doing in Mavis on the way up on the Motorway felt like I was going somewhere fast, the sense of speed is so much more in a small car. In a weird way I suddenly felt infinitely grateful to be working class and not made of money. I couldn't help thinking owners of cars like this could become blasé at such epic life moments. I'd be driving home in a Vauxhall Corsa which made those laps all the more special. In a similar way to my perfect day when I got to fly a chopper, it was being taken for a ride, not the actual driving / flying myself that was the highlight of the day.

After driving the Aston and having the picture taken it was the turn of the hot lap. The mate i'd promised the Subaru ride to was away on holiday so i'd be taking it myself. 2 laps of the track as a passenger with the Scooby being driven by a professional. I was in the back, joined by a couple. I was expecting to be driven expertly at speed, getting out at the end with a nice glow. What we got was an exhibition in skilled madness. The guy driving threw us around like he had 5 minutes to live and wanted to go out in style, he was damn good! Part of the makeshift track which is at an abandoned MOD site has a makeshift chicane made of cones which looks like a dead end until you reach them where there is a small gap. I had crawled up to this in 3rd gear in the Aston, the guy driving us decided he'd go at it in 5th, the skill of the dude was something to behold. For the spectators it was easy to see who had experienced what. The drivers came out with an air of smugness and quiet satisfaction, the passengers had one of two expressions; stunned disbelief or laughter! The woman sat in front of me had the first but me and her husband couldn't stop laughing. After taking the last of my photos after the ride I saw another couple with the same expression as mine. I knew exactly what they'd just been doing, they didn't stop laughing even once they'd walked back to their car.

With any luck luck in a few weeks I'll be back to full health (well full health for me anyway) and everything that was bad before will be nothing but a memory, one swiftly deleted. As long as the walk goes ahead OK this Thursday I'll be back on track on the averages, one cool thing a month minimum. With the half and full marathon out the window I'll be looking for everything else the Purple book has to offer.

All suggestions welcome as ever, answers on a postcard please :)

Rossifer x