The best month of the year, if only as in theory I need only set foot into the Prospect job for 2 out of the 31 days. I've ended up spending quite a few more hours there and at John Lewis but still managed to fit in plenty of fantastic days, each as good as the one before it.
Borough Market - London
For starters, a trip into foodie heaven courtesy of my culinary friend Abz. Borough Market is found near London Bridge, across the road and down the steps from the London Bridge Dungeons exhibition where you are greeted by a genuine 7 foot tall chappie who just so happens to have the same name as me. Small world...
Abi showed me the entrance to the market which had a few stalls and looked all well and good but the stalls just kept going, and going... I've never seen a market so big before offering so many different things. As well as Fruit and Veg stalls, butchers and fishmongers there were several cake, bread, cheese, sweet, cooking sauces, spice stalls, everything! Each stall also offered a
chance to taste their produce for free, everyone was welcoming and you never felt forced into
buying things, just to try new things. I soon found a couple of tea stalls where this one chappie
showed me how to make a perfect cup of Darjeeling tea. Apparently you shouldn't add boiling water as it damages the taste. Needless to say I came away with a few bags of the good stuff,
slowly losing track of how many different types I've got now... x
Birthday Scuba Diving - Farnborough
This doesn't count in theory as an entry in the PB as it was my 3rd time of doing it, but it did add to an overall excellent month so it's more than worth a mention. The diving was a joint present for me and Mum, done in August as Mum had a pretty epic start to the holidays. This was a test
to see if Mum would be able to do the basics in
preparation for what I hope we'll both be doing in November, the shark diving. We did the diving in Farnborough pool, a pool with a quirky feature of having the deep end slap bang in the middle with two shallow ends either side. Much as I remembered being nothing but awkward at scuba diving myself, the real challenge would be for Mum in two very different ways. For someone who struggles putting her face in the water in a swimming pool, the thought of complete submersion must have been daunting. Along with that was a rather neurotic fear of sharing the mouth piece of the diving gear (called the Regulator). The instructors were testing them all before we started and apparently, overcoming that little obstacle was her biggest achievement of the evening so fair play to her! :)
It's safe to say neither of us are natural divers. Part of what we had to do whilst underwater were a couple of tests, 2 involved taking the regulator out of our mouths then putting it back in
again. Using a variety of hand gestures the instructors showed us what to do then in turn got each of us to try it. I think Mum had already reached the boundaries of things she was going to conquer so was leaving that for another day, it wasn't as daunting as I thought it would be. The hardest bit was just moving about in a straight line and stopping myself from floating too high or sinking. The problem I found was with the diving gear itself. With all the various things hanging off of it you end up looking like an octopus. You have the 2 regulators on your right side and on the left side, a gauge for the gas tank and a thingy to put air in and out of the jacket. I wanted to be able to get good at using the flippers, knowing I'd be needing this knowledge in a few days time in Wales. Despite the flippers being the wrong size I just about got there in the end ;)
I knew I had to get Mum doing the basics before getting her in a tank of sharks, I hope the day made her 100% sure about either getting in with me this November or just coming along to take the pictures; not the best situation to be worrying about how much air is in your jacket when you're surrounded by Tiger Sharks... x
At it Hammer and Tongs - Blacksmithing in Dorset
The first entry of the month to get crossed of the
Purple Book was one I'd been looking forward to
for some time - Blacksmithing. Set in the same
place Mum did her Hazel Chair making a few months ago, this time all 3 of us would be having a go making something. Unlike before where there were quite a few people at the place doing a few courses, it would only be the 3 of us, the guy in overall charge of the place and Alex, the
Blacksmith himself who were there. We had no idea what sort of things we'd be making. The other 2 had fireside equipment in their minds, I had illusions of grandeur, coming away with a decorative Claymore or something. For starters though we were told we'd be making some nails. A few worried looks when Alex wasn't looking as I think we all thought nails weren't the most exciting sounding things to make but we were proven wrong. Unlike the nails you'd get at B&Q, these were the ye olde types that were used back in the day for hammering into huge solid doors. It was a bit like the Generation game, you get an expert in to do his thing, the end result looks great and easy to do, and then it's your turn...
I was up first. You start off with a long, thin cylindrical steel pole which you put into the forge, the fire used to heat the steel. As well as making sure the fire is heaped up correctly with coke (black coal like stuff, not the Pepsi kind) you have to check the colour of the steel to make sure it's the right
colour. When it gets orange it's out the fire, onto the anvil and on with the hammering. The trick is to first whack the pole to make it square before tapering the end to make a point. This takes several times in the fire and on the anvil until the point is made and the whole thing is straightened. After that you heat it orange for another time, whack it with the hammer over a chisel bit found on the anvil and then bend it so the nail bit is pointing at an angle. Back in the fire with the point pointing up out the fire and you get yourself ready with the vice, the next bit is all about speed. When the bent bit is bright orange it's the quick bit. In the vice point down with 1cm of the nail bit sticking up. Twist off the excess of the steel bar and you start hammering, it feels more frantic this time as you've pretty much got one chance to get this bit right. The hammering flattens the nail to make the head, the better you get at it the better it looks. After doing 3 of them we could all see an improvement in what we'd done, Alex was doing a great job of bigging us all up and finding our individual strengths ;)
Next followed the speed round where we were all timed to make a single nail. Amazing how much harder it seems when you know everyone is watching you! At the end, Mum ended up
with the quickest time but no head on her nail, Dad had the slowest time but the best looking nail and I reckon I had the best of both worlds, a decent time and a pretty decent looking nail to boot!
After that came the main event, we'd be making the fireside equipment of 2 pokers and a
decorative shovelling thingy. To say the bar was
raised was close, widened more like. I soon realised a career as a Blacksmith was not for me and the blisters and sheer lack of strength in my hands became apparent. The wider the metal you're using, the harder it is to hammer and shape it and I certainly found this. I didn't help that I'd left my steel in the fire for too long and it had burnt the end so I had to start again. Dad and I chose to make the same designed poker, one with a swan necked shepherd's crook on the end while Mum made a funky looking shovelling thingy with a leaf on the end. Mum ended up being the star student as she was the only one of us to make a second tool, this time a small letter opener with another leaf design on it. By this time though her hands were catching up with her as well so it turned into a team effort with Dad and Alex chipping in.
This will go down as another fantastic day which I thoroughly enjoyed but will most likely never take up again, due entirely to having completely the wrong build. Although Alex said
Blacksmithing is much more about technique than brute strength, the brute strength plays a huge part in it. As with all my entries I'd encourage anyone to give it a go as there is nothing like bringing home something beautiful looking which you yourself have made. My poker may not be perfect but I wouldn't change it for the world x
One Man and his Bog - Llanwrtyd Wells
August 28th saw the return of the wackier side of The Purple Book. It posed a challenge that when I heard it for the first time made my eyes light up at the sheer unadulterated stupidity and genius of it - Bog Snorkelling in the smallest town in Britain. Despite it's size, Llanwrtyd Wells has a reputation for holding a number of unique events such as Man vs Horse, the alternative games and of course, Bog Snorkelling. The Waen Rhydd bog consists of 3 bogs (trench full of thick brown water, reeds and water scorpions) 2 of which we were using and one, shaped differently to the others with a pole in the middle of a circle shaped bog, which is used for the mountain biking version.
Any questions as to why I would be taking part in something so insane left as soon as I was back in Wales. For some reason it feels like going home every time I visit, never thought I'd find anywhere I'd love more than London and Cumbria. After parking up and getting into my wetsuit in the back of Mavis, it was off to the Bog to see what I'd be letting myself in for. Considering I was down as number 44 and had only registered a few days previously there were quite a lot of people there. We were greeted by several people in fancy dress and snorkelling gear, one of which was a pretty brave bloke in a bright green mankini. My body is shocking enough as it is so be rest assured you wont find me in one of those unless it crops up in the PB...
I'd never kid myself into thinking I had any sort of real fitness level, so was starting to feel slightly shocked at these athletic looking people coming out of the bog after their swim looking completely spent. I remembered thinking though 'It's only 120 yards in total, how hard can this be..?'
Famous last words! For starters, let me talk you through the setup of the official World Bog Snorkelling Championships of which I would be taking part. Both Bogs are 60yards in length with a starting pole and a white pole at the end marking half distance. The aim is to get from one end to the other in the quickest possible time using only a scuba diving kick or doggy paddle stroke dressed in a snorkel, flippers, wetsuits for the less hardy and fancy dress for the exhibitionists. I jumped in the water when it
was my turn, starting to wander what I'd let myself in for, but still wondering what all the fuss was about. I'd seen a lot of people make a quick start then struggle later and I was about to find out why. I held onto the starting post ready, waited for the whistle then I was off. It felt as If I was swimming through treacle mixed with shredded wheat, I was already struggling at 20 yards. Halfway to the first post I had to rip off my flippers as I'd lost all feeling in my arms and would have sunk other wise, I then started walking to the white post. By the time I was near the 3/4 distance I was virtually crawling. I wanted to try and finish strongly but I could hardly move. The crowd could see I was struggling so I got a good cheer to the finish, I eventually got back to the start and collapsed on the platform, knackered.
I felt someone putting the medal around my neck which made me light up, but still I couldn't move. The two guys about to go after me were looking pretty nervous seeing me come out as I couldn't feel my thighs, was shivering pretty bad and had a pretty weird feeling in my throat like I'd been kicked by a deer. I got out and slumped in the chair Mum was using before for several minutes until I was able to feel my legs again. I looked down at the medal around my neck and just smiled, it had been well earned. Never had anything
taken so much out of me before, without doubt the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
Not only were we in the presence of the World record holder that day, we were also there to witness a new one being broken. The previous record was broken 3 times on the day, once by the previous holder. The new record though now stands at a belting 1:24:22. I was more than happy with my 2:43:63 though, especially as someone took 5 minutes to complete it and several more failed to finish. A painful but fantastic day for an event I can now say I've been there, done that and got the medal, swimming cap and T-shirt x
Brighton
xxx Rossifer
For once fortune had smiled upon me. Instead of merely making my own luck, today's activity had been gifted to me thanks to an online competition by Reading 107. All you had to do was fill in your details and type in the squiggly code at the bottom of the page. Weirdly enough I thought I'd failed in doing this as each time it came up with an error message for me. I gave up but weeks later received an email saying I'd won 4 tickets to the Go Ape in Bracknell where I would be Segwaying with 3 of whoever I would choose to join me.
March had seen me well and truly catch up with my 'one cool thing a month' averages, now April brought with it a new challenge. Far from being a quiet month with plenty of cool things lined up and people to see, none of them were purple material and there was nothing lined up. Having lost all that weight several weeks ago and taking a long time putting it on I came up with an idea which would solve my weight problem and lack of April befuddlement - a 24 hour eat-athon.
